Homeschooling Abbey
Frequently Asked Questions
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Greetings, folks! Here are some of the questions I've been asked so far that are not answered in the book. If you have further questions, feel free to CONTACT US, and I will post others that will be of interest to my readers! Enjoy!! Carol |
Q: What made you decide to write this book?
As homeschooling parents of four years, Rick and I often feel we’re still falling short of answering
some of the questions we’re asked, even though some were quite repetitive (what does Abbey do for
friends, and has she been tested). We’re typical of homeschooling parents in that we don’t feel the
one- and two-line answers we give suffice a situation that has brought the family so much peace and
happiness. I wanted to equip us and other families with a quick, informative and enjoyable read
which can be passed on to interested friends or recommended. The book is only 125 pages long, so
it can be read in a couple of nights, but I think the insights folks will glean are pivotal.
Q: To whom should I recommend this book?
A large populous of people will enjoy Homeschooling Abbey, and I’ve categorized three key types
below:
• Any friends or relatives who have shed a tear over their child’s education, either because the
child isn’t making good grades, is acting out, falls asleep chronically in class, gets picked on, or is
bullied. Our country’s education system works well for several types of intelligence, but for others, the
chronic forced learning, structure, and uniformity can be toxic. Homeschooling may be a viable
alternative, and this book can help these families make a decision;
• Homeschooling families who struggle to answer the questions put forth by others will find this
book helpful. Instead of struggling with lengthy answers or the frustration of being stonewalled, they
can recommend or pass on this book;
Q: At times in your text, you speak with caustic suspicion or downright cynicism at
institutionalized learning. And yet, as an author, you often visit schools. How come?
I do speak at schools and I enjoy that. I also don’t believe that people should commit crimes and
wind up in jail, but that doesn’t mean I will refuse to help out a prison literacy program. I love writing
and love young people, and anywhere that I can help them is fine with me—and as I say inside the
book, I don’t think homeschooling is the answer for every family. I don’t mention homeschooling on
novel tours; we talk about the writing life, and as I was raised in a funeral home and garnished much
fodder from barrier island life, we focus on other stuff.
I’ve yet to be asked, though I would have a harder time justifying, why I teach freshman English at a
college when I let ‘er rip in the book about burned-out college students and bureaucratic nonsense.
My gut-instinct answer is that I’m addicted to students, and I can understand any teacher who loves
the job. In a more rational context, I am an adjunct professor, which means I only take on a couple
classes at a time, and without all the meetings, paperwork, and politics of full-time employ, I can keep
my teaching more pure. I do think adjuncts hold an advantage over full-time faculty in this case. I’m
not distracted by all the “stuff.” I swing from the chandeliers when I teach, and my students
consistently say my classes are more interesting than the others they’re taking. It’s not a perfect
world, but so far, nothing negative has managed to drown my love of young people and helping them
exercise their thought processes. When it does, I’ll pull a Socrates and teach writing from my living
room.
Q: You sound like a teacher at heart. How can you say that homeschooling will work for parents
who are not?
I don’t “teach” Abbey. I sit there, and she learns from what’s in her hands as most homeschooled
kids honestly do. When I say I love young people, I’m generally talking about those the age of my
target writing audience: 14 to 20. As for younger kids like Abbey, I’m not gifted in the patience arena,
and yet, our own kids are a joy once we get them home.
In several chapters, I talk about what happens to kids’ minds when they’re no longer forced into so
much regiment. Teaching is for large groups. Learning is for individuals.
I’m only now struggling with a “subject” for the first time. Abbey is 11 but surpassed her age level in
math a couple years back, and she has decided she is in love with geometry. We’re using a
freshman/sophomore text book, and sometimes I beat my brains out to figure out a way to help her
along with abstract concepts. But it works for us because we both love math and I want to learn it
myself (I slept through it first time around), so it’s more like we’re playing a game together. And it’s
incredible to watch her understand this stuff. My mouth hangs open at times. If it gets too tough and
we’re no longer in a state of joy, I’ll find her an online class.
Q: Your subtitle is Your Basic Mom Tries Home Education & Tells All. But to be a published
novelist you don't sound typical. Wouldn't home schooling come easier to someone like you?
It’s similar to the above, but this question leaves me winded. Writing novels is highly, highly intuitive,
and the more cognition one applies to it, the more easily passages can become hackneyed or
messed up. No, I am not that smart. My IQ is around 130, which I believe is the same as your
average grad student. I test very poorly. According to the great homeschooling pioneer John Holt,
how children actually learn and how they are taught in school are two very different things. They really
don't need someone standing in front of them, chattering, and spoon-feeding information. In fact, that
can be detrimental. The best thing a home schooling parent can do is to cultivate his own natural
curiosity about the world and investigate with his child as a support player.
Q: How scared were you when you started home schooling?
One a scale of one to ten? I was a 9.5. You don’t want to play around with your kids, obviously.
They're the most precious gift in life. My discussion in Chapter Four: Intellectual Burnout, Age 7,
covers how a leap to home learning can feel like a cliff-jump—but you’ve realized the woods behind
you are totally on fire. In other words, it helped to have my eyes opened about toxicity in
institutionalized learning. I have a list of books and web sites in the Epilogue that bolstered my
understanding and confidence.
Q: You’re her mom. Love is blind. Would you know if homeschooling had turned Abbey weird?
Truthfully, I’ve only been asked this question once, but it is my favorite; hence we’ll call it a “Favorite
Asked Question” in the FAQ. Yes, I would know (hee ha). The teenagers who read my novels often
ask why I write from the point of view of more popular kids, even if there’s a weirdo in my story, such
as Chris in The Body of Christopher Creed. My answer is that you have to write from what you know.
If I hadn’t been so social ‘n hip in high school (due largely to my long-standing academic hangover), I
might not have lived the starving-artist-pig life during my first decades as an adult. I do know kewl. I
wouldn’t call Abbey that. But I would say that homeschooling has given her a “mystique” that I kind of
like. The 11- and 12-year-old boys on the beach size her up like they do the other girls, but they’re not
as forthcoming with their infernal (ridiculous) flirty remarks because they’re all, “Look! There goes
that girl who doesn’t go to school…you talk to her…no, you talk to her…” Abbey surfs, has a
gymnast's muscle mass, and what I love to call the “typical” homeschooled air about her. Here it is:
Long shiny hair, jeans, layered t-shirts, leather bead necklaces, no earrings, no glitter, lip gloss if
anything; prone to rash guards over bikinis in summer and wearing jeans tucked into boots in the
winter. I think the religious right has its own look as well, but I say this concerning us moderates
around other homeschooling families and they laugh and laugh!
Q: Your book is about homeschooling one child. How does the situation change for parents
homeschooling three or four?
I’ve heard said many a time that it is easier to homeschool a crew than it is to homeschool one. In
certain chapters I share my worries about Abbey enjoying her own company too much and getting me
keyed up over it. Siblings can be great company for each other. As many of us don’t “teach,” we’re
not doing lesson plans. As well, my artistic nature probably makes me and my genetic offspring
happy in solitude, though most people would prefer a bit more noise and commotion. I think most
parents would enjoy homeschooling two or three (who can be taught to curtail their squabbling) as
much as I enjoy my one. Definitely, my joy is transferable.
Q: Why haven’t your written any novels yet about a homeschooled kid?
I actually have. It’s on my publisher’s desk, but they’re holding the manuscript as ransom until I finish
a book they want more. The book is a sequel to The Body of Christopher Creed, called, as we speak,
The Steepleton Chronicles. The hero’s girlfriend was homeschooled, graduated at 16, and is a
freshman in college at the story’s beginning (it is common for homeschooled kids to get their G.E.D.s
and move on at that age). She's a major player in the story. My publisher may decide not to publish it
as Creed was so well received that it is a career risk to tread on that turf again. Comparisons will be
made. Obviously I don’t mind taking risks with my life, but we’ll have to see what the big guns say.
Q: Can my kids write to Abbey?
Absolutely, and she would be happy to write back. I’m not hip to posting pictures of her all over the
place as we guard her privacy (though the picture on the bookjacket is actually her, taken two years
ago). She hasn’t had her own computer yet (tho Santa is coming), so she doesn’t have a web site
right now and rarely checks her own email as it’s too hard to get my workaholic can out of the desk
chair. But if you put “For Abbey” in the subject bar on the contact page, she will get it and respond.
She can answer any questions kids have if they're trying to decide about home schooling, among
other things. She can do media interviews (if she wants to).
Q: Do you travel and speak about this book, or just about your novels?
I would be happy to travel and speak on Homeschooling Abbey, but as homeschoolers are so
spread out and not conjoined by many local organizations, I don’t expect to do much except
conventions. I will post if I’ll be speaking, and if you’re interested in having me and Abs visit your
town, your web board, your live chat, your convention, feel free to contact me.
As homeschooling parents of four years, Rick and I often feel we’re still falling short of answering
some of the questions we’re asked, even though some were quite repetitive (what does Abbey do for
friends, and has she been tested). We’re typical of homeschooling parents in that we don’t feel the
one- and two-line answers we give suffice a situation that has brought the family so much peace and
happiness. I wanted to equip us and other families with a quick, informative and enjoyable read
which can be passed on to interested friends or recommended. The book is only 125 pages long, so
it can be read in a couple of nights, but I think the insights folks will glean are pivotal.
Q: To whom should I recommend this book?
A large populous of people will enjoy Homeschooling Abbey, and I’ve categorized three key types
below:
• Any friends or relatives who have shed a tear over their child’s education, either because the
child isn’t making good grades, is acting out, falls asleep chronically in class, gets picked on, or is
bullied. Our country’s education system works well for several types of intelligence, but for others, the
chronic forced learning, structure, and uniformity can be toxic. Homeschooling may be a viable
alternative, and this book can help these families make a decision;
• Homeschooling families who struggle to answer the questions put forth by others will find this
book helpful. Instead of struggling with lengthy answers or the frustration of being stonewalled, they
can recommend or pass on this book;
Q: At times in your text, you speak with caustic suspicion or downright cynicism at
institutionalized learning. And yet, as an author, you often visit schools. How come?
I do speak at schools and I enjoy that. I also don’t believe that people should commit crimes and
wind up in jail, but that doesn’t mean I will refuse to help out a prison literacy program. I love writing
and love young people, and anywhere that I can help them is fine with me—and as I say inside the
book, I don’t think homeschooling is the answer for every family. I don’t mention homeschooling on
novel tours; we talk about the writing life, and as I was raised in a funeral home and garnished much
fodder from barrier island life, we focus on other stuff.
I’ve yet to be asked, though I would have a harder time justifying, why I teach freshman English at a
college when I let ‘er rip in the book about burned-out college students and bureaucratic nonsense.
My gut-instinct answer is that I’m addicted to students, and I can understand any teacher who loves
the job. In a more rational context, I am an adjunct professor, which means I only take on a couple
classes at a time, and without all the meetings, paperwork, and politics of full-time employ, I can keep
my teaching more pure. I do think adjuncts hold an advantage over full-time faculty in this case. I’m
not distracted by all the “stuff.” I swing from the chandeliers when I teach, and my students
consistently say my classes are more interesting than the others they’re taking. It’s not a perfect
world, but so far, nothing negative has managed to drown my love of young people and helping them
exercise their thought processes. When it does, I’ll pull a Socrates and teach writing from my living
room.
Q: You sound like a teacher at heart. How can you say that homeschooling will work for parents
who are not?
I don’t “teach” Abbey. I sit there, and she learns from what’s in her hands as most homeschooled
kids honestly do. When I say I love young people, I’m generally talking about those the age of my
target writing audience: 14 to 20. As for younger kids like Abbey, I’m not gifted in the patience arena,
and yet, our own kids are a joy once we get them home.
In several chapters, I talk about what happens to kids’ minds when they’re no longer forced into so
much regiment. Teaching is for large groups. Learning is for individuals.
I’m only now struggling with a “subject” for the first time. Abbey is 11 but surpassed her age level in
math a couple years back, and she has decided she is in love with geometry. We’re using a
freshman/sophomore text book, and sometimes I beat my brains out to figure out a way to help her
along with abstract concepts. But it works for us because we both love math and I want to learn it
myself (I slept through it first time around), so it’s more like we’re playing a game together. And it’s
incredible to watch her understand this stuff. My mouth hangs open at times. If it gets too tough and
we’re no longer in a state of joy, I’ll find her an online class.
Q: Your subtitle is Your Basic Mom Tries Home Education & Tells All. But to be a published
novelist you don't sound typical. Wouldn't home schooling come easier to someone like you?
It’s similar to the above, but this question leaves me winded. Writing novels is highly, highly intuitive,
and the more cognition one applies to it, the more easily passages can become hackneyed or
messed up. No, I am not that smart. My IQ is around 130, which I believe is the same as your
average grad student. I test very poorly. According to the great homeschooling pioneer John Holt,
how children actually learn and how they are taught in school are two very different things. They really
don't need someone standing in front of them, chattering, and spoon-feeding information. In fact, that
can be detrimental. The best thing a home schooling parent can do is to cultivate his own natural
curiosity about the world and investigate with his child as a support player.
Q: How scared were you when you started home schooling?
One a scale of one to ten? I was a 9.5. You don’t want to play around with your kids, obviously.
They're the most precious gift in life. My discussion in Chapter Four: Intellectual Burnout, Age 7,
covers how a leap to home learning can feel like a cliff-jump—but you’ve realized the woods behind
you are totally on fire. In other words, it helped to have my eyes opened about toxicity in
institutionalized learning. I have a list of books and web sites in the Epilogue that bolstered my
understanding and confidence.
Q: You’re her mom. Love is blind. Would you know if homeschooling had turned Abbey weird?
Truthfully, I’ve only been asked this question once, but it is my favorite; hence we’ll call it a “Favorite
Asked Question” in the FAQ. Yes, I would know (hee ha). The teenagers who read my novels often
ask why I write from the point of view of more popular kids, even if there’s a weirdo in my story, such
as Chris in The Body of Christopher Creed. My answer is that you have to write from what you know.
If I hadn’t been so social ‘n hip in high school (due largely to my long-standing academic hangover), I
might not have lived the starving-artist-pig life during my first decades as an adult. I do know kewl. I
wouldn’t call Abbey that. But I would say that homeschooling has given her a “mystique” that I kind of
like. The 11- and 12-year-old boys on the beach size her up like they do the other girls, but they’re not
as forthcoming with their infernal (ridiculous) flirty remarks because they’re all, “Look! There goes
that girl who doesn’t go to school…you talk to her…no, you talk to her…” Abbey surfs, has a
gymnast's muscle mass, and what I love to call the “typical” homeschooled air about her. Here it is:
Long shiny hair, jeans, layered t-shirts, leather bead necklaces, no earrings, no glitter, lip gloss if
anything; prone to rash guards over bikinis in summer and wearing jeans tucked into boots in the
winter. I think the religious right has its own look as well, but I say this concerning us moderates
around other homeschooling families and they laugh and laugh!
Q: Your book is about homeschooling one child. How does the situation change for parents
homeschooling three or four?
I’ve heard said many a time that it is easier to homeschool a crew than it is to homeschool one. In
certain chapters I share my worries about Abbey enjoying her own company too much and getting me
keyed up over it. Siblings can be great company for each other. As many of us don’t “teach,” we’re
not doing lesson plans. As well, my artistic nature probably makes me and my genetic offspring
happy in solitude, though most people would prefer a bit more noise and commotion. I think most
parents would enjoy homeschooling two or three (who can be taught to curtail their squabbling) as
much as I enjoy my one. Definitely, my joy is transferable.
Q: Why haven’t your written any novels yet about a homeschooled kid?
I actually have. It’s on my publisher’s desk, but they’re holding the manuscript as ransom until I finish
a book they want more. The book is a sequel to The Body of Christopher Creed, called, as we speak,
The Steepleton Chronicles. The hero’s girlfriend was homeschooled, graduated at 16, and is a
freshman in college at the story’s beginning (it is common for homeschooled kids to get their G.E.D.s
and move on at that age). She's a major player in the story. My publisher may decide not to publish it
as Creed was so well received that it is a career risk to tread on that turf again. Comparisons will be
made. Obviously I don’t mind taking risks with my life, but we’ll have to see what the big guns say.
Q: Can my kids write to Abbey?
Absolutely, and she would be happy to write back. I’m not hip to posting pictures of her all over the
place as we guard her privacy (though the picture on the bookjacket is actually her, taken two years
ago). She hasn’t had her own computer yet (tho Santa is coming), so she doesn’t have a web site
right now and rarely checks her own email as it’s too hard to get my workaholic can out of the desk
chair. But if you put “For Abbey” in the subject bar on the contact page, she will get it and respond.
She can answer any questions kids have if they're trying to decide about home schooling, among
other things. She can do media interviews (if she wants to).
Q: Do you travel and speak about this book, or just about your novels?
I would be happy to travel and speak on Homeschooling Abbey, but as homeschoolers are so
spread out and not conjoined by many local organizations, I don’t expect to do much except
conventions. I will post if I’ll be speaking, and if you’re interested in having me and Abs visit your
town, your web board, your live chat, your convention, feel free to contact me.